The Hard Road to the Stars

It is perhaps fitting that, in the year marking the 50th anniversary of Neil Armstrong et al.’s historic landing on the moon, a movie like ‘Ad Astra’ would come along (the more direct treatment, ‘First Man’ from Damien Chazelle, was released last year).  Directed by James Gray (‘The Lost City of Z’) and starring Brad Pitt, ‘Ad Astra’ represents a different kind of space adventure drama, one whose DNA is much closer to Stanley Kubrick's ‘2001: A Space Odyssey’ and Steven Soderbergh's ‘Solaris’ than ‘Gravity’ starring Sandra Bullock or ‘The Martian’ starring Matt Damon.

 

Set in the not-too-distant future, ‘Ad Astra’ posits an alternate world in which humankind has explored and settled planets (outposts if not entire populations) well beyond earth to the very edge of our solar system, as far as Neptune to be exact (Pluto isn't a planet anymore after all).  When earth is rocked by a series of unexplained power surges causing heavy losses of life, intrepid and cool-under-pressure U.S. Space Command astronaut Major Roy McBride (Pitt), who survived one such power surge, is recruited and sent out on a mission to make contact with his father (Tommy Lee Jones), a brilliant scientist and astronaut who failed to return from his own mission 16 years earlier going “where no man has gone before” to seek out intelligent lifeforms, because his continuing experiments are what's believed to be the cause of the deadly power surges (something to do with the release of anti-matter).

 

Abstract, dreamlike and ruminative, AA may not be the rollicking feel-good space adventure to everyone’s liking on account of its snail-like pacing and occasional scenes of graphic violence (moon pirates and angry space baboons anyone?), but for all that it's not a bad movie at all.  Not by a long shot.  AA is a profound and thoughtful piece, making us self-reflect and contemplate our place in the larger universe.  Comparison to Stanley Kubrick’s masterpiece is definitely warranted, but I also can’t help but detect subtext of Francis Ford Coppola’s ‘Apocalypse Now’ in this excellent and well-crafted film. 

 

Grade: A
 

The Final Cut (and Slash, Stab & Shot to the Head)

Fully 37 years after he first drew blood (not the Red Cross way) from the poor and unwitting sheriffs of a small town who mistook him for easy prey and mistreated him in the 1982 macho "right wing" actioner ‘Rambo: First Blood,’ Hollywood’s most iconic “one-man army” draws blood for the very last time before riding into the sunset in the aptly named closing chapter of the five-movie saga, ‘Rambo: Last Blood.’  The grizzled and traumatized Vietnam vet with a fetish for hunting bows may have softened with age, but he proved once again that he’s not a hombre you want to mess with.

 

‘Last Blood’ sees Rambo settled down into retirement, living the simple and unassuming life of a cowboy/rancher in the middle of nowhere, Arizona with his housekeeper/friend Maria and her granddaughter Gabriela.  When Gabriela, heedless of her grandmother’s and Rambo’s advice and wishes, attempted to find the long-lost father who abandoned her while she was young in “lawless” Mexico and disappeared without a trace for her troubles, “Lone Wolf” John Rambo put on a headband (okay, not really) and went on one last mission to recover her – dead or alive – (it turned out to be the former) and deliver God's own righteous vengeance upon the Mexican cartel flesh-trader scum who dared to make her a prostitute and administer the fatal drug overdose which took her life.

 

Like 2017’s ‘Logan,’ ‘Last Blood’ has the soul of a western.  One can also easily say it’s ‘Taken’ (you know, the Liam Neeson movie about another man with a “particular set of skills” whose daughter was kidnapped by similar bad people) by way of ‘Home Alone.’ Yes, ‘Home Alone,’ the 1990 Macaulay Culkin movie about an 8-year old who defends his home by booby-trapping it against hapless would-be home invaders during Xmas.  Because what Rambo did to defend his homestead against the invading army of Mexican cartel goons would do Kevin McCallister proud.

Grade: B

 

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The Freaky Girl

In a crowded film industry dominated by major studios and big-budget “event” movies, relatively low-budget indie films often find it hard to get a release date, if they’re lucky enough to get a commercial release (as opposed to straight-to-streaming service or DVD treatment) at all.  All things considered then, the American-Canadian science fiction not-quite-horror thriller ‘Freaks’ from Zach Lipovsky and Adam B. Stein should count itself fortunate that it was picked up by a distributor (Well Go Entertainment, mostly known for importing Asian actioners to the American market) and given a theatrical release over a year after worming its way through the international film festival circuit.

 

‘Freaks’ is not a remake/reboot/reimagining of the 1932 B&W cult classic about a woman tarred-and-feathered into a squawking chicken so that she’s “one of us,” but it’s still pretty freaky in its own right.  It’s the mystery and suspense laden story of Chloe (Lexy Kolker), a 7-year old girl imprisoned – or rather, isolated from the outside world – by her overprotective dad (Emile Hirsch) in their claustrophobic home for undisclosed reasons.  While normal life goes on outside, she couldn’t even go out to buy ice cream from the kindly ice-cream truck vendor “Mr. Snowcone” (Bruce Dern) down the street.  “Just WTF is going on?”, you want to tear out your hair asking through the first two-thirds or so of the movie.

 

Sorry, but you’ll have to scour the web for spoilers (even Wikipedia is mum on its plot) or just go see it for yourself.  Suffice it to say that ‘Freaks’ only gradually reveals the answers to our questions, like the slow peeling of the layers of an onion before the big payoff.  Ultimately, while said payoff isn’t exactly earth-shattering or wholly unexpected, being a variation of a well-tread sci-fi mythos, it isn’t “M. Night Shyamalan frustrating” either.  That’s saying something at least.

Grade: B 
 

The Hustlers of Wall Street

As some of you may know, I’m a bit of a sucker for “based on a true story” movies in which fact can be more interesting – if not stranger – than fiction.  Of course, such movies are only purported to be based on actual events, often exaggerating or otherwise sensationalizing characters and situations for the moviegoing audience.  ‘Hustlers,’ the real-life story of how a group of New York City strip club dancers hustled the wolves of Wall Street in the wake of the financial crisis of 2008, isn’t guilty of such over-exaggeration, but unfortunately that also proved to be its greatest weakness.

 

Told through a series of extended flashbacks during an interview of former stripper Dorothy aka “Destiny” (Constance Wu) by investigative reporter Elizabeth (Julia Stiles), we learn that her inadvertent descent into criminal activity began when she befriended popular and experienced dancer Ramona (JLO), who not only taught the wet‑behind‑the‑ears Destiny the three essential “hooks” of pole-dancing but also took her under her wing and became a motherly mentor to her.  Due to the great recession resulting from the aforementioned crash of the real estate market, the girls find their preferred clientele shrinking and their own lifestyles crimped.  So what is a poor hard‑working girl to do?  They concoct a scheme to “date rob” (as opposed to “date rape,” get it?) rich men maxing out their credit cards by incapacitating them with a potent mixture of MDMA and ketamine, all the while telling themselves that there’s a certain poetic justice in preying upon the wolves of Wall Street who steal from poor hard-working folks.  A girl’s gotta make a living with a clear conscience, after all.

 

Predictably, their elaborate scheme eventually collapsed like a house of cards and the date-robbing ring ran afoul of the law. Far from being a cautionary tale, however, ‘Hustlers’ seems to say that sometimes crime does pay.  Destiny and ring-leader Ramona ended up getting slap-on-the-wrist sentences with little or no jail time and put on probation.  What they did was wrong but it wasn’t exactly murder either.  Ho-hum.  That pretty much sums up ‘Hustlers’ for me. The characters aren’t all that engaging and the screenplay lacked the wit, cynicism and biting humor of other inspired-by-true-story movies such as ‘American Hustle,’ ‘The Big Short’ or ‘Pain & Gain,’ never mind ‘The Wolf of Wall Street.’  In the final analysis, this story of strippers-gone-bad just isn’t interesting or scandalous enough to write home about.

Grade: C

"It" is back

It’s no secret that ‘It,’ the supernatural horror box office phenomenon based on one of Stephen King’s most popular novels which made $700 million and became the highest grossing horror movie of all time, would have a follow-up Chapter Two since that movie was released two years ago.  After all, Pennywise the Dancing Clown (aka simply “It”) is perhaps one of King’s greatest creations, tapping into our primal fear of clowns and unseen monsters – real or imagined – lurking in the darkest corners, certainly a nemesis worthy of an encore.

 

So it is that 27 years after the bicycle-riding kids of the so-called “Losers’ Club” vanquished the killer klown from outer space, I mean the storm drain after confronting It head-on at the ramshackle house on Neibolt Street, they discover to their great dismay that It wasn’t as vanquished as they initially thought and must therefore return to face It once again.  Now middle-aged, the erstwhile members of the Losers must reunite in their childhood town of Derry, Maine to banish this malevolent entity of pure evil incarnate for good (this time for sure, as there won't be a Chapter Three).

 

‘It: Chapter Two’ lacked some of the charm of Chapter One partly due to the fact that the damaged kids we’ve come to empathize with (and even liked) are now adults, not all of whom are likeable.  Ben is no longer the poor bullied fat boy but a handsome stud and possible love interest for Jessica Chastain’s red-haired and freckled adult Beverly, although the grown-up versions of bespectacled Richie (SNL alum Bill Hader) and his best friend Eddie (James Ransone) are just as annoying as when they were kids.  At a bladder-stretching two hours and forty-nine minutes, Chapter Two is also 35 minutes longer than its predecessor, an indulgence that’s really unnecessary considering the film’s rather thread-bare plot.  Despite these shortcomings, ‘It: Chapter Two’ delivers enough Lovecraftian scares and creepy atmosphere for me to recommend It.

 

Grade: B+ 

More Quick Takes

Sharks in a Lost City

2017’s low budget shark cage malfunction thriller ’47 Meters Down’ starring Mandy Moore did well enough to earn a sequel in ’47 Meters Down: Uncaged,’ which follows another group of unsuspecting young women (high school girls this time) scuba-diving in the ruins of a submerged Mayan city of archeological significance as they’re hunted by roving sharks.  With a budget doubling its predecessor’s (though still a frugal $12 million), ‘Uncaged’ does offer somewhat higher production value if not a proportional increase in thrills. 

Grade: C

Hide and Kill

When I saw the trailer of the blood-drenched horror-comedy ‘Ready or Not’ starring Aussie actress Margot Robbie, whom I later discovered to be actually Aussie newcomer Samara Weaving (niece of genre veteran Hugo), I knew it’s a movie I just can’t miss.  Its simple story of a young bride who walked into a living nightmare when she married into a wealthy old-money family and forced to play a game of seemingly harmless hide-and-seek is a delicious, gory slice of slaughter-fest heaven.  Who said rich people don’t strike unholy deals with the Devil?  I wish there are more movies like this. 

Grade: A 

Angel Got Framed

Had someone told me back in 2013 that ‘Olympus Has Fallen,’ the R-rated action thriller starring Scottish He-Man Gerard Butler as a super “die-hard” secret service agent/glorified bodyguard of the president who saves the day, would go on to become a franchise, I would likely have branded him or her a lunatic.  Alas, here we are six years later with the third installment in what is being called the “Fallen” film series, ‘Angel Has Fallen,’ which sees our super secret service hero framed by nefarious behind-the-scenes forces for a failed assassination attempt on the very man (Morgan Freeman) he had sworn to protect.  Yeah, right.  For fans of the series, it’s more of the same and what we’ve been hungering for.  For everyone else it’s just meh. 

Grade: B 

Frozen in Time

High concept thrillers with a sci-fi twist can often be a hit-or-miss affair, and the latest low-budget Blumhouse release ‘Don’t Let Go (Relive)’ definitely falls into the latter category.  The story of a LAPD detective (David Oyelowo) who mourns the death of his beloved niece only to be given a second chance to prevent her murder after she calls him “from the beyond” offers an interesting premise to say the least, but the execution and pacing fell flat in a case of promises unfulfilled.
 

Grade: C+